THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO PEOPLE YOU’LL MEET IN COLLEGE

“some things in life refuse to change; like bad NET SPEEDS in hostel, And crazy friends.”

Everyone who has spent a decent amount time in college must have definitely stereotyped the people around him. There are some things in life that refuse to change; some things are the same, devoid of the circumstances. Voila, the constants in the equation of life.

 

1. The guy who is always walking in the corridor

 

So you’re studying for an exam; you look out of your room and you’ll find him walking aimlessly in the corridor. Two hours gone, you decide to take a break and you still find him in the corridor. You’ll think he’s a jobless nut who doesn’t study. But just wait until that 8 point GPA starts roaming in the corridor with him.

 

2. The guy who just woke up

 

For this guy, the standard reply to statements ranging from “Hey… How are you?”, to “Hey did you solve the quantum intricacies to make time travel possible?” – is going to be “Yea no I just woke up”. You doth wonder when this hibernating creature tends to his daily needs at all.

 

3. The guy who is always sleeping

 

Quite the opposite of the guy who has just woken up; this guy is permanently asleep in his room. At least the former woke up for things like lunch, dinner and labs. Knocking on this guy’s corridor would find half the people in the corridor awaken before he does so himself.

 

4. The guy who is going to attend that tutorial extra class no matter what

 

All the D he gets is from the D block. The only place he travels to will be the acad block. Like absolutely nowhere else. You don’t know where he lives or where he eats. But you’ll always find him in that one class which you only attend for a week after T1/T2.

 

 

5. The couple who are always together

 

It’s virtually impossible to find one without the other. Even if you manage to find him/her alone, it would just be the awkward one liner. If you do find him alone though, be sure there is tissue paper involved.

 

 

6. The guy you’ve only seen in the bathroom

 

Consistently again and again, he’s there only in the bathroom. You will not meet him anywhere else. Every time you decide to take a shower, or brush your teeth, or pee or do any related bathroom activity, surprise surprise. They say perpetual motion is impossible to achieve. But then you have this guy undergoing perpetual motion in the bathroom all the time. IYKWIM.

 

7. The gu(lt)y who is always home

 

Gotta gult bro. That one guy you know who just goes home every chance that he gets. It’s like the padlock over his room’s bolt is permanently there.

 

8. The guy who knows everyone… wait for it… but no one knows him

 

Because he’s the stalker we all deserve. And also the one we need; especially when the girl has no idea of your existence, and you need to know everything about her, you know he’s the guy to go to. This guy is like the database for every girl on campus. Name her, he knows her. “Every breath you take and every move you make/ Every bond you break, every step you take, I’ll be…” stalking you.

BONUS

 

9. The guy who stereotypes everyone else

 

He simply watches silently; slowly judging and classifying every person he sees. Then, when he realizes the large amount of time he has spent assessing these people, he decides to make it into a TDB article.

 

Gokul Nanda

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